from her book, Fuel.
Santa has a bad memory.
Santa forgets your name
the minute he talks
to the next person.
Santa calls you by a baby's name
and doesn't even know.
Ho! Ho! Ho!
Should you tell Santa?
Already he thought you were a girl
even though you just had a haircut
last week.
How can he remember
all those wishes?
How will Santa ever find
our house?
The world has turned to
red sweaters, jingles,
freezing rain.
Santa says he's on a diet,
that's why he's not eating pancakes
with the rest of us.
Mrs. Claus told him to
lose some weight.
Santa keeps drifting back
for more chatting.
He sits down at our table.
What else can we say to Santa?
Santa says ain't.
~ Bonus Poem
Another Christmas Poem by Wendy Cope (from Serious Concerns)
Bloody Christmas, here again.
Let us raise a loving cup:
Peace on earth, goodwill to men,
and make them do the washing-up.
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